1. |
polar bears
01:04
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all of these days go by slow
without you hear to tell me jokes
polar bears keep me warm
out in this winter storm
cold air defeats me in the end
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2. |
i hate your band
01:35
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i hate how you always cancel plans for your stupid band
out late almost every single night you come home to fight,
i no longer think that you’re my type of boy you just destroy my world
am i your toy am i just another boring girl to you?
i found a new friend, one who’s band i can stand
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3. |
earthbound
01:40
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I woke up I could not get back to sleep
I went outside and when my feet
they hit the ground they couldn’t stop
This is earthbound, this is gold sounds, this is out of my control,
I need to see you, I need to feel you feeling me
I want to look up at the sky and feel a sense of wonder in my stomach
I want to feel like these bones are floating away from the ground
I want to feel free and unencumbered by the weight of being me
I want to feel like me, like the old me, the one
who always did the right thing
Did I ever know me? When did I
start to outgrow me? When did I
get bound to the earth below me?
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4. |
high school songs
00:51
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I’m watching your covers of
our favorite songs from high school
and singing along it feels so cool,
it’s like were hanging out again,
but we’ve been on separate coasts since then
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5. |
praxis
03:01
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everyone came home, I walked away alone
I kept my shades drawn low and my lights out
I’ve been focusing on self improvement
but I know more theory than practice
I’ve been turned down for more jobs than blogs now
I love people but I don’t live in praxis
I am trying to let go or move on from this older group of friends that I loved for so long
but they want nothing to do with me or no that’s giving myself too much credit entirely
everyone moved away or moved on and I was just one small part of that
I found new friends who love me and I love them back
I’m amazed by people these days, everyone is doing so much
I’m inspired by those who surround me but I find that I’m still stuck
in my hometown
trying to make my mom proud
trying to help my dad out
I should feel pretty good about myself these days but I never get it perfect,
I could let it go or just try to avoid it.
I’ve tried to change my process for evaluating my self-worth
not “I’ve felt shitty all month” but “I’ve learned so god-damn much”
I’ve found it sort of helps, I guess I’m focusing less and less on my mental health
I’m doing pretty well
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Fenn Macon Worcester, Massachusetts
check out the bands I am in:
The Baja Blasters
Superjerk
Really Great
Opposable
MCtheProfessor.GOV
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